So, I got this e-mail in my inbox and it goes a little like this:
Date: 10/14/2005 23:23:54 -0700
From: Brogan Matthew <matthewhzpu@yahoo.com>
To: takayuki@hyperguy.net
Subject: proceed to watching Hentai sweeties scream from hard insertions
see them perform Cartoon Untouched blooming girls are
eager to get in some hot, hard touch! MANGA Innocent
princesses are begging for some hot attention. Don’t
keep these tight hotties waiting!
<link removed because it's too fucking retarded to post here>
HENTAI, ANIME Nasty innocent honeys are exploring
hardcore territories of stretching and creaming!
Hentai Tiny holes have to handle some really widening
penetrations, and they enjoy it!
</end spam>
So I really got to ask...
Who the hell writes this crap? How hard do you have to be hit with the retard stick to come up with such captivating phrases like "see them perform Cartoon Untouched blooming girls are eager to get in some hot, hard touch!" and "HENTAI, ANIME Nasty innocent honeys are exploring hardcore territories of stretching and creaming!" ?
Nay, this couldn't have been written by a native English speaker. There just isn't enough creative spelling. But seriously, I think we could do better. If you were writing a letter like this, how would you word it?
Personally, I'd go with something like....
Date: 10/14/2005 23:23:54 -0700
From: Brogan Matthew <matthewhzpu@yahoo.com>
To: takayuki@hyperguy.net
Subject: HOLY FUCK PORN
Hither to, fine ladies are waiting for you to thrust yonder
meat demon unto wanton apple pie of sweetness.
Juicyness akin to deluxe slip and slides abound, fair traveler of internets!
Dost large eyes and shiny hair harden thy resolve?
Nay, the largest eyes and fairest skin are bountyfull amongst
our steamy site's offerings!
http://www.yeoldecartoonfuck.cum/milk_maids_in_heat.htmlThe gamut of their fingering finely surpasses musical notes of
thy suculent sounding lute, for shizzle.
</end ye spam>